Can A Relationship Work After A Breakup? Find Out

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Written By Alexis

Alexis has 7 years of experience as a relationship therapist, a degree in psychology, and a deep personal understanding of human relationships.

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can a relationship work after a breakup

This question of ‘Can a relationship work after a breakup’ has eluded many people with different thoughts. Some are still passing through the Post-Breakup Do’s and Don’ts and are probably still left with unbearable feelings.

Breakup among loving couples is borne out of several factors, ranging from individual personalities, not spending enough time together, infidelity, different perceptions toward trivial issues, variance in sexual satisfaction, lack of emotional and social quotient, and uncontrollable emotion.

I always got this question from our audience and decided to elaborate on it.

Can a relationship work after a breakup?

As much as all these mentioned could be a determining factor in breaking up a happy relationship, the onus is on the couple to decide whether they can find ways to bounce back to a more comfortable, lovely moment.

For every seemingly different resulting in a breakup, partners can figure out the balance and carefully examine the best approach to unravel the situation.

A breakup is more like a wound that needs to be treated with diligence and care.

Imagine someone you once couldn’t stop loving, someone you can easily fall back on in times of adversity has finally turned into a person you are developing a high taste of displeasure for. It feels weird, right?

A breakup might bring relief and optimum freshness, especially for a challenging and toxic relationship. Yet, strategic ways exist to reconcile and have a permanent solution to whatever issues partners face.

Below are the crafted number of ways a relationship can work after a breakup.

How To Make A Relationship Work After Breakup

1. Be willing to give reconciliation a chance

The first step to stepping out from the tussle of a breakup is for both parties to be ready for a reconciliation.

Don’t settle for reconciliation if you still need more time to overcome the bruises caused by the breakup.

If you are sure of giving a second chance and your partner also has his or her mind made up, you then can choose to give the relationship a try.

2. Choose a problem-solving technique to communicate the solution

While you are both sure of talking about it, it is imperative to decide whether or not it can be settled within both of you.

Whether both of you can reach a decisive conclusion and the new agreement will be held in high esteem or the only solution is an independent third party that will be objective in making a just reconciliation and offers advice based on merit.

A third-party service like a relationship therapist, arbitrator, or a highly revered mutual associate could help both parties voices be heard. Such a person could make meaningful suggestions that will positively affect the relationship you are trying to save again.

3. Riddle out why the breakup happened

Trying to solve the problem without understanding the root cause is an effort in futility. Such reconciliation will go south as the initial relationship.

It is natural for emotion to elude the reasoning, especially after either party chooses to beg to be accepted and promises heaven and earth to effect changes.

It is best advised not to let this stage pass without exploring the fundamental cause of the differences that led to the breakup. Both parties should do as much as they can to
pour out their mind in the most understandable way.

Don’t spare words in the name of I don’t want to hurt her; it is better that her feeling is bruised once than having controversial issues over time.

4. Leave the past for the past

Every ending is a new beginning, remember. Now that you have made your mind up to reconcile after a breakup, let freshness settle in your affair.

It is pertinent to note that when partners agree to give love another chance after a breakup, they must be ready to let the past go.

The memory of the unfairness, misunderstanding, cheating, and distrust your partner has plunged into you must be laid to rest somehow.

Though the past may play some roles in shaping the future, what matters is that you should not let it out of the bag always or make a consistent point about it if indeed you want to get together after a breakup and move on.

Stop referencing the blurry grievances you have suffered from your partner if you truly aim to move on. The memory will keep flashing, but be bold enough to control it and see your partner as the changed person he or she has promised to be.


Also Read: Signs The Relationship Is Over For Him


5. Be open to outside opinion but trust your guts.

As it is unarguable that there is no manual for a perfect relationship, both partners are encouraged to discover and understand their ways and follow the rules of the path they choose to follow religiously.

But it is more enlightening to make room for outside opinions like from family, friends, experienced relationship therapists, blogs, and random TV series that talk about relationships and family.

Outside opinions are likely to educate partners better on how to have their ways in the relationship. Nevertheless, there is no sole or unanimous agreement about what makes a happy relationship.

Suppose you and your partners trust your ways enough. In that case, if you both find it uneasy about embracing outside opinion, if it will be challenging to let outsiders influence your decision, the best remains to follow your conscience and do things as you both agreed would be convenient.

6. Be the change

As someone coming out from a breakup to make a new beginning, looking forward to recognizing some change promised by your partner effectively is not enough.

Your partner might have a larger share of why the relationship is not working but do well to
examine your error also and be ready to effect change first.

When you start thinking of ‘can a relationship work after a breakup,’ no matter how little, be prepared to do right, those little things you are not paying attention to in the first place, or that good thing you think you need to improve on.

Do not wait for his or her promises of change to be fully fulfilled before you start your obligation as a partner.

7. Do not rush the healing process

One good thing about a breakup is that it helps you come out to outer reality after you might have felt used or jilted.

Please do not allow your partner to induce you quickly into an infatuation for another time; wired yourself to allow natural feelings to settle down in you, and be sure it is a genuine affection you have for your partner.

Do not forget the lessons learned in the past. Take things slowly, more with sensitivity.

See the reconciliation as a new beginning but only with thoughtful lessons. Try to learn from each other again.

Kindly explore what you are not paying attention to well enough before the breakup, the steps you might have missed in the past, and be determined to get it right now that you have agreed to come together again.

This time, apply a high level of caution so you won’t feel used again.

8. Accept your mistake and be remorseful where necessary

As much as erring is humane, making an unintentional mistake is much expected in a relationship. To come out fine after a breakup, both parties must be ready not to be hellbent on their irregularities.

Try as much as you can not to make a reoccurrence of a mistake, especially the one that hurt your partner. Let it be avoidable as much as you can.

Always be ready to make rectifications if committed and do not be adamant that your partner should always understand.

As much as perfection is unrealistic, making a deliberate error at your partner’s expense is a red flag to a reconciling relationship after a breakup.

9. Be overly submissive

Submissiveness of both genders to one another has been proven to be a good recipe for eternal love.

Here, we are not telling you to agree to the command of your partner’s authoritative voice sheepishly but let your partner see that his or her opinion is essential in your decision-making.

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