How Long To Wait For A Married Man To Leave

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Written By Alexis

Alexis has 7 years of experience as a relationship therapist, a degree in psychology, and a deep personal understanding of human relationships.

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how long to wait for a married man to leave

Much has been written and said about the infamous “other woman” in a marriage. From books to stories and movies, the other woman has been described with livid attributes – her charm, wits, charisma, and acts of seduction. 

While this may be far from how many women wait on the sideline for their married lovers to quit their marriages to be with them, many affairs with married men end with mistresses getting used and dumped. 

The truth is that dating a married man comes with challenges, regardless of its benefits. 

One may spend weeks, months, or even years waiting for their married lover to leave their spouse for them. This does not mean they will eventually. 

How long to wait for a married man to leave his wife

Statistics show that only 3% of men marry their mistresses because most men don’t intend to leave their marriage, especially if they have children, and only want the thrill of the affair. 

Married men often remain with their wives and continue their marriage, and this means that most relationships with married men would end without anything substantial in the long run. 

So, if you’re wondering, how long to wait for a married man to leave his wife, you should evaluate your expectations because you may likely get dumped. 

Relationships with a married man can be a mixture of many emotions, and you should be ready for whatever happens. 

There are many fears, risks, heartbreaks, and even depression associated with dating a married man. 

Nevertheless, the hassles shouldn’t dissuade you from getting involved with someone you like and taking your chances. 

Every situation is unique; your married lover may like you just as you do and eventually make plans to be with you. 


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Signs He Will Leave His Wife For You

There are several ways to tell if a married man will leave his wife for you. Here are some signs you will see:

1. He looks out for you

The majority of married men who are in an extramarital relationship do so purely for amusement and sex. 

A man will likely value the relationship more than intimacy if he is easy to talk to and spend time with you without any intimacy. 

He won’t leave his wife for you if you see that all he wants from you when he’s around is sex. 

Genuine care and affection are the hallmarks of true love; when someone treats you with such tenderness and honors your choices, you can be sure he may leave his wife for you. 

A man will consistently demonstrate his affection for you if he genuinely wants to be with you. 

2. He feels tense and unhappy in his marriage

Your married boyfriend may leave his wife if he believes his marriage is a mistake and is not content with his spouse. 

They might be incompatible, putting a lot of strain and stress on him. This could be an indication that he intends to dissolve the union.

3. There is no love in his marriage

The possibility that your relationship with him will develop into something serious is higher if you notice there isn’t much love between him and his wife. 

It is also an advantage if you see their marriage is close to ending.

However, this sign should be taken with a pinch of salt because he could fall in love with you and still love his wife simultenously. He doesn’t need to despise his wife for him to be attracted to you. 

4. He has no kids

There are good reasons for your man to remain with his family if he has kids. When it comes to a cheating relationship, children are naive spectators. 

The most affected are children regarding the side effects of dealing with infidelity.

You will have less to worry about if he and his wife don’t have any children. There is a greater chance that he will leave his marriage for you. 

Still, just because he doesn’t have children does not guarantee he will rush over to you. Many things remain in play.

Whether his marriage is sweet or sour, the foundation of the marriage is a factor to consider. 

Understanding the intricacies of a committed marriage and the challenges associated with ending that kind of relationship is crucial. 

Whether he has kids or not, his departure from the marriage will be complex, especially if he still cares about his wife.


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5. He brings up a “future” that includes both of you

Dreaming is easy, and dreaming about the future is easier. This won’t be enough when you both have pillow talks of going on vacations and jolly rides. 

It may all turn out to be wishful thinking.

However, it’s a much more encouraging sign if you have conversations about the future that are more grounded in reality.

Your future has a better chance of materializing if you both have regular conversations about where to live, your future priorities, and the financial realities of your life together.

6. He has a toxic wife

He may leave his wife for you if she has been unfair or cruel to him. Perhaps he came to you in the first place as a source of safety or escape, and all he wants is an excuse to escape his toxic wife. 

You just happened to be in the right place at the right time. 

Nevertheless, remember that there will still be consequences even if he decides to leave his wife for you. Divorce is never simple, especially if he has been unfaithful to her. 

He will likely need to work through a lot of emotional baggage for months or even years.

From that experience, he will need to heal, and helping him heal won’t be simple. If he begins to heal, he may move on from you when he realizes you were a stepping stone to his recovery. 

On the other hand, if his wife’s actions are not as severe as he painted them, he may not be telling you the truth about his marriage. 

His wife may be the victim, and if he were to leave her for you, he might be the actual cause of their issues, which could affect your relationship.

Always investigate to find out the truth to avoid being used.

7. He puts you first

Earning a married man’s commitment is difficult; when you do, it can help you.

It means that even though he is devoted to his family, he is also willing to be dedicated to you. 

However, his priorities when it comes to you will prove whether or not he is willing to leave his wife. 

He might leave her to be with you if he consistently stands by your side through thick and thin and prioritizes you.  

8. He feels trapped in his marriage

A man may feel stuck in his marriage for several reasons. Family life can be demanding, and the monotony of this type of household can be too much for some men to handle.

You could be the source of excitement he has been seeking. The ideal remedy for the captivity he experiences in his marriage. He may leave his wife for you to retake control of his life. 

Also, he may need to take accountability for how settled his wife is in the marriage. 

For instance, she may be ready to purchase a home and start a family, but if he doesn’t buy the idea, he may have decided to leave as soon as possible.

9. He promises to do so

Undoubtedly, some men will lie regarding their plans to divorce. And given that they are lying to their spouse to cover up their affair, this should not come as a surprise. 

Men will avoid this topic if they are confident they won’t leave their marriage. They will choose to remain ambiguous about the issue rather than give you a direct answer.

Therefore, if he looks you in the eyes and promises to leave his marriage for you, there is a chance he’s been honest. 

However, he may back down or change his mind when the chips are down, so don’t get your hopes high.


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10. You’ve established a stronger connection

You notice that when it comes to the both of you, it’s not all about sex. You two have long, interesting talks frequently. 

His mind piques your affection just as much as his body does, and you know he feels the same way.

There is no doubt that there is more to this than a surface-level physical attraction. If genuine love and intellectual compatibility are also present, you should go for it.

11. He works towards it

He may have promised to leave his wife, but it doesn’t mean anything if he doesn’t work towards it. 

He has to plan details of when and how that might occur. 

He may not intend to make the decision tomorrow, but he should not have intentions of making it in a year or more, leaving you to your thoughts.

When he lays out practical plans for the near future that will enable the two of you to be together, that will be a sign for you.

12. He stops living with his wife

Married men have a lot of responsibilities, especially when they have kids, but if he wants to leave his wife and be with you, he will start by moving out of the house. 

He most likely won’t file for divorce if they continue to live together in the same home.

Remember that actions speak louder than words. If he continues to deceive you with false promises, tell him to do something, not just talk.

13. You have gone past the honeymoon phase

Nothing is fair about a prolonged relationship, not on his wife, and certainly not on you. 

But if you both have recently started dating, it’s unlikely that he will leave his wife for you.

There’s only a chance it could turn into something serious if he chooses to carry on the affair and becomes intentional about you by genuinely getting to know you. 

Remember that the longer it continues without him being intentional about you, the more lost you are.


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14. He takes risks

You may take it as a sign that he will leave his wife for you when he does not keep your relationship a secret.

When he becomes careless about keeping things a secret between you two and acts in ways that make his wife knowledgeable about the affair, it could indicate that he wants to force her to react and end their marriage. 

15. No wedding ring on his finger

When a man takes off an invaluable symbol of his marriage to be with you or when he is around you, it shows how much he respects you and is unwilling to rub the fact that he is married in your face. 

A wedding ring symbolizes a man’s love and dedication to his spouse. 

His pride in being a married man is evident from the ring on his finger, and it would be clear that he is serious about leaving his wife if he stopped wearing the ring, even when she is present.

Final Thought

Some of the above thoughts can help you decide how long to wait for a married man to leave his wife. 

If you don’t see any sign he will leave his wife for you, you need to start rethinking your relationship with him rather than waiting. 

You can bring the matter up with him or give him an ultimatum to walk out of her life if you really want him.

Doing this will demonstrate to him that you’re a woman worth fighting for rather than someone who will watch helplessly while her man is with someone else. 

If he is honest and intentional about you, he will do right by you. 

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