The thought of an ex moving on like you were nothing to them can break a healing person that recently broke up more than the break up itself. It fills your mind with heavy questions you will always find difficult to answer.
Seeing them happier while you are still nursing the breakup pain can be more damaging to your healing process, especially if you see them flaunting their new relationship on social media or talking about another partner.
So, what does it mean when your ex moves on quickly after the breakup?
Many reasons could amount to your ex’s decision. Seeing them happy or acting as if they do not care immediately after the breakup could be their best way of dealing with the post-breakup trauma.
They may seem happy on the outside but still grieving about the breakup. On the other hand, they can move on quickly because they are now with a better partner or feel they are no longer restricted, especially if the relationship is toxic.
Among many other reasons, they move on before the actual breakup. They get disengaged in the relationship before you agree to part ways, and the decision no longer hurts them.
They had mourned the undesired situation and relinquished the intense emotional attachment to you before you even started grieving about the breakup.
Maybe you have been hurting your ex and keep turning them off. Perhaps they talked about it before the breakup, but you didn’t take them seriously. They ask for a breakup because they can no longer cope.
Finding closure after a breakup is difficult, especially if you see your partner moving on immediately as if nothing had happened.
You need to know the reasons why they behave in such a manner. In this article, I will help you better understand why your ex moved on quickly and what to do afterwards.
Reasons why your ex moved on so quickly
1. The relationship was toxic
If the relationship were full of physical or emotional abuse, disagreement, and constant fighting, it would likely be toxic to your partner.
They will feel suppressed and can’t wait to leave the relationship. Their happiness is lost, and they can’t wait to have it back. They don’t live their desired life while with you.
Breaking up means they want their life and happiness restored. They will move on quickly in joy and even in earnest jump to another person who offers them the satisfaction you couldn’t provide.
2. They stopped loving you before the relationship ended
If an ex moved on immediately after break up, it could mean they had exhausted the romantic vibes and admiration they had for you before they even left the relationship. Their romantic rush for you has stopped, and they can’t help it.
They stopped loving you for several reasons. You may be boring and less outgoing than they thought you would be during the talking stage. You got below their expectations.
You are more like a burden to their heart, not a partner you thought you were. They are drained of whatever romantic emotion they have for you and can’t wait to leave.
The moment you agree to part ways, they will speedily move on because they feel at peace not forcefully being with a person they don’t love.
3. They find someone else
Irrespective of how bad you’re as a person during the relationship, the good memories you shared will be missed by your ex, and that could make them feel tepid for days before they move on.
But if they moved on earlier than anticipated, it could mean you’ve been easily replaced by a new person they’ve seen before the relationship ended. There’s a high chance they met another person while you were dating.
It could be that your ex had a serious relationship before they met you. After trying you out, they return to the person they met before you. You’re just a placeholder while their rancor lasts.
This means they didn’t just move on, but the new person they are with is already in the picture while you’re in a relationship with them. They waited for the relationship to end amicably before they moved to another person their heart chose.
It could not necessarily mean they were cheating. Still, if you are not giving them enough attention or not making the best out of the relationship, they can have their mind drift and develop feelings for just a new friend or co-worker that is giving them the needed attention.
They nurse the pain in silence while in a relationship with you. Now that they have a better offer. They will quickly move on.
4. They are faking being happy
Forgetting about you so soon may not be what they desired, but they may not be strong enough to erase the memories you have shared. They need a distraction to speed up the healing process.
What they are doing at this point might be why you think they’ve moved on. They have not; they are just faking it. They are faking it to get distracted from the thought.
That is why they unusually upload their photos on the internet, engage in social trends or attend social events. It is a way to reignite their confidence and prepare for more life challenges rather than unnecessarily dwelling on the past.
5. They want to erase the memories shared
Triggering memories shared will always complicate things for them. Recollecting all the happy and fun moments can be more painful than the actual breakup and even slow their healing process.
They may try to erase the memories by engaging in activities that can abrogate remembering the good time you have shared.
They can go with anything that can distract them from the pain. Rather than hugging their pillows and endlessly thinking about you, they would rather get up and go on exciting dates with friends, flirt with the opposite gender, or tour around the cities on weekends.
They are unhappy and have not easily moved on; they are trying to use the activities to take their mind off you and the romantic memories shared.
6. They want to make you feel jealous
It can mean they want to provoke you. They want you to be emotionally downcast and make you think you are missing a lot without them.
An ex with narcissistic behaviour will feel like you bruised their ego and can do anything possible to make you feel the heat.
They will guilt trip you on social media with weird insinuations, flaunt their new relationship, and share triggering events you have together on social media.
If especially they get into a new relationship soon, they will flaunt the new relationship on social media to hurt your emotions.
7. They are feeling lonely and need a physical connection
Ex-trapped in loneliness after the breakup would want to look for an engagement that keeps them busy or rather quickly jump into another relationship, thinking they will happily kill boredom.
They need to bypass the pain and talk to people. At this time, it will appear as if they’ve moved on, but they’re just bored and merely finding attachment.
Also, your ex can move on quickly if they always need a physical connection from the opposite sex. This means they move immediately to fuel their sexual escapade with someone else.
If you had an active sexual life with them, they might be seeking to replicate the physical intimacy by quickly jumping into another relationship.
8. Their best way of dealing with a breakup
Many people move on quickly after a breakup simply because they feel it is the best remedy. They honestly feel bad the relationship couldn’t work, but instead of toiling on the irreparable past, they decided to prepare for what the future has for them.
They can deal with the breakup by finding a new engagement to keep them mentally busy or move on to another relationship.
However, they can look happy on the outside but can be thinking about you and crying in their private time for losing you and wasting their time with the wrong people.
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They won’t get back because they are done with the relationship, but they miss you and are still hurt for the wasted time.
They can’t pull up with another drama, but they still feel the silent pain and act as if things are alright facially.
What to do when your ex moved on quickly
You’re confused and still nursing the hard pain your ex caused you. You feel like you made a big mistake as you see them moving on as if all is fine. This could be more painful if your ex initiated the breakup.
This phase of emotional turmoil is best managed with a careful process. Here are basic things to do when your ex moves on so quickly.
1. Avoid Contact
If you are convinced, you are both done with the relationship and unwilling to allow reconciliation. The best at the time is to avoid contact with your ex.
Do not stalk them on social media, delete their phone number, and archive any triggering event like photos or clothes you have that can remember the past.
If you have frequent physical contact, try to cut it if possible. Do not accept friendship in place of a broken relationship, at least not when you are still dealing with your emotions.
2. Take your time with a new relationship
Blindly jumping into a new relationship is not the best way to replicate the action of an ex who moved on with another new partner.
Make your decision independent of them, and ensure you have healed adequately before accepting a new person.
Rushing into a new relationship because your ex has done the same will only make things further difficult for you.
3. Have a support group
At such a time, you need people around you to share your thoughts with and seek concise advice. Talk to family or friend who understands your pain and is ready to see you through the phase.
However, exercise caution if your friend is mutual with your ex. They may be relating what you’re going through to your ex, which can further break you.
Also, make friends outside of your comfort zone. Join social groups and connect with positive minds as much as possible. If you build a strong support group around yourself, it’s a matter of time before you forget any drama from your ex.
4. Redesign your focus
If your energy has been clogged around your ex and things still end up in futility, it is high time you do things differently.
Consider things that will rejig your confidence and make you a better person. You can return to school to expand your education, take online classes, engage in craftwork or learn a skill.
Also, take your health seriously. Regular exercise makes you release endorphins, which helps improve your happy mood.
Getting in shape makes you irresistible to everyone, and you’ll have access to the best of a partner in the end.
5. Be determined to self-improvement
This is the best time to carefully analyze what truncated the relationship and how to get better at handling the next one.
Read self-help books, learn from relationship experts, or at the height of it, consult a counsellor if you are still getting it difficulty finding closure after your ex moved on quickly. It is a phase to discover the best of yourself.