Text Messages That Will Make Him Fear Losing You

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Written By Alexis

Alexis has 7 years of experience as a relationship therapist, a degree in psychology, and a deep personal understanding of human relationships.

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texts messages that will make him fear losing you

The love between two people sometimes brings unpredictable behaviors such as emotional outbursts, obsession, physical attraction, commitment, etc.

Time, effort, and communication are needed to keep the flame alive.

However, if one partner is doing the job of keeping the relationship together, the other might feel undervalued and not loved.

Making your partner develop a fear of losing you can be the spice to improve your relationship. By instilling a fear of losing you, you can cause your partner to reawaken his role in the relationship, causing him to change his attitude and behave better. 

One way to do this is by sending text messages that will make him fear losing you and keep him on his toes.

If you need to instill the fear of losing you in your partner, you’re in the right place. Read on and put the insights in this article into action. 

Why he takes you for granted

Before you think about the right text messages to send your partner, it is crucial to state that the idea of taking you for granted sometimes begins to manifest once he feels too comfortable in the relationship.

However, if you remain where you’re not wanted, you may face significant problems and dissatisfaction in the relationship. Your relationship is supposed to serve you and make you happy.

How to secretly make him worry about you

To stir your relationship to the right track, you must not reveal your intent. This tactic is delicate and risky. You might lose the ground and push him away if it’s too obvious. 

You need to use the right text approach to achieve your goals secretly without giving yourself away. Every tactic in this article is worth considering before using it to avoid sending the wrong message.

The first thing to consider is the goal. The goal is to make your partner reciprocate the love and realize your worth. One way of attaining this is to show independence and live outside your relationship.

The second option is to remain calm, dignified, and self-respect. If you decide to make your partner jealous by mingling with other guys, it can bring disrespect to him. 

The third approach is maintaining composure to avoid making your effort seem like begging for communication or commitment in the relationship.

How to make him worry about losing you through text

A good text message can instill the right amount of fear in a guy. You can decide to reply slower or not at all. Here are some text messages that are appropriate for the situation.

1. Text him about going out but wait to invite him

Share the unnecessary part of your plans with him. Send him a brief text, but don’t seek permission. E.g

Hey baby, I have plans to hang out with friends after work. 

Or 

I have sudden plans with friends and won’t be available for our weekend plans. 

This text shows you can hang out without him and also value your friends. It also shows you can have fun independently without him. 


ALSO READ: Love Letter For Your Boyfriend That Will Make Him Cry


2. Change the way you text

Adjust how you text him. Reply slower; make it simple but formal. E.g

Okay, have fun.

Or

I can’t talk right now; I’m busy. 

Or 

I was busy, that’s why I’m replying late. 

This text shows another approach to the relationship. It shows independence. 

3. Text him about other options

Message him about your interactions with other guys. E.g 

Hey babe, a guy approached me today asking about my profession. He’s a professional doctor.

Or 

This guy at work won’t let me rest. He keeps hitting on me. 

4. Talk to him

You can send an honest text like, 

Hey, something is bothering me about our relationship we need to clear. 

Or

I’ve been thinking about our relationship and what I want.

Or

I don’t know if we’re on the same page in this relationship.

This strategy shows you want an honest and face-to-face conversation. It will make him reconsider your needs and how he treats you. However, only use this approach if you know he’s willing to talk. 

5. Text him about yourself

Find your desires. Your text messages should be more about you. Let it reflect how busy you are with your goals or other activities like a new class, yoga, fitness routine, etc. E.g

I won’t be home tonight; I have a yoga practice.

Or

I will be late from the office.

This tactic tells him you’re about self-growth. Ensure he notices your progress. This will make him fear losing a confident lover.

6. Text less about sex

Withholding intimacy is a significant hold in many relationships. The strategy is effective, and the change is questioned. This attitude shows you’re not in the relationship for games.

But make him want it through texts, like, 

I have a new fantasy. We could try it the next time we’re together.

Or 

I have fantasized about having sex in an outfit I got. I’m planning on wearing it to your place. 

This text creates anticipation and further excitement, placing him in thoughts. You should send him a text later to cancel the plans. This will increase his desire to see you and fear of losing you. 

7. Text about your social life

Spend more time with your friends. Set the tune as you please to make him jealous. This tactic shows your social life without him. E.g

Last night was amazing. I had a great time with my friends. We had lots of discussions, and we plan on doing it again. 

Or 

Do you remember that sexy outfit we saw in that movie? I finally bought it, and I’m wearing it for the occasion with my friends.

This tactic will create images of other guys seeing you in that sexy outfit. It also makes him think about how different men will perceive you. This tactic is manipulative. You can also send him a selfie of you with friends in your sexy dress. 

8. Become yourself in the text

Sometimes, you need to remind him of who you are. An independent, self-sufficient, and determined lady. This strategy shows you don’t depend on anyone to be yourself. E.g

I need to start creating more time for my goals.

Or

I’m sorry, but I have to cancel our plans for tomorrow or the weekend. An unexpected activity came up. 

This tactic shows your toughness and keeps him wondering about the reason behind the cancellation. It increases your confidence, your life role, and your independence. He will think twice about losing you. 

9. Ignore his texts

This strategy is strict and should be considered if other efforts fail. It sets a different atmosphere, letting him know you care less.

The thought of losing you will create tension within him. He’ll focus more on why you are not replying. 

10. Text him a future without him

The narrative of your plan should not involve him. Text him less about your long-term goals. He’ll notice the withdrawal if he cares about you. E.g

I plan on having kids with a professional doctor.

Or 

My dream man is a gym instructor.

This tactic is effective if he is none of those. This will create unrest and will draw him closer to you. He’ll think about improving the relationship.

11. Text about flirting with another guy

You can use harmless flirting as a wake-up call. This will show that others appreciate your charm. You can create a name, take a picture with a handsome guy, and send it to him. E.g

Text him a provocative selfie when you’re out.

Or 

Post that photo where he can view it.

Or

I had a deep conversation with a male colleague (name) today. He makes me laugh each time.

This tactic may cause curiosity and backfire. But it can also create jealousy when he sees you mingling with other guys.


ALSO READ: Sweet Birthday Messages That Will Make Him Happy


12. Text to cancel at the last minute

Giving him less time shows you care less about him. Cancel the planned invitation. Create life priorities. E.g 

I have to cancel our plans tonight; I want to be alone. 

Or 

I need some alone time tonight.

Or

I’m sorry, babe. My schedule has been busy lately. I’ll text you when I’m home or when I can. 

Or

Sorry, honey, I have to cancel our weekend plans; I already have other plans. 

This tactic will show you’re interested in solo time and can live without him. It will make him wonder why you choose to be alone instead of hanging out with him. It’ll also make him seek your attention. 

13. Your text effort should be reciprocated

Your boyfriend may enjoy your text but won’t text back. This tactic requires self-strength because you have to withdraw from him to indict this action. E.g

I see you don’t enjoy my texts

Or

I notice my texts go unappreciated.

Reducing communication or keeping him at arm’s length will make him rethink his position. 

Distancing yourself will give him time to think about his wrongdoings. He will make an effort to reciprocate your texts if he notices your withdrawal. This tactic will make him fear losing you.

14. Stop showing care through your text

The purpose of this kind of text is to trigger his emotions while hiding yours. Your texts should be carefree. Don’t inquire about his day or work, and limit your questions.

This high road shows he needs to improve in areas you are complaining about. You can mention your interest in an activity that doesn’t involve him. E.g 

Hey babe, how are you

Or

Just “Hey”

If he knows you as a big-time texter, he may feel disturbed about your one-word text. This change might be a firm shove to make him fear losing you.

15. Change your look without texting for permission or suggestion

Self-care is another way of making him fear losing you. If he’s not ready to change, then shower yourself with lots of love.

Don’t seek his opinion before changing your looks, fashion, piercing, or appearance, but make him notice. This will surprise him and reflect a new light.

This tactic will reveal your evolution and create a fear of losing you.

However, keep the changes under wraps and only reveal them when you’re confident. Even if you’re head over heels for a guy, he needs to know how to cherish you.

16. Start texting like a lady

Become unavailable. This tactic will give value to your time and make him fight to spend time with you.

Start acting like a traditional lady who is unavailable and busy. Act shy about whatever he asks, even if you’re interested. E.g

Honey, my weekend is filled up. I am planning to try something new.

Or

We are having ladies’ night, and I won’t be answering the phone.

Or

I can’t hang out with you in your spot.

This attitude will show that you have your own choices and principles. In addition, it will increase his confidence in you, seeing that you’re strong and can protect yourself.

However, remember to be yourself, not someone else. This change will create a new way of loving you.

17. Send unexpected text

You can text him unexpectedly about having a solo vacation and hanging out with friends. Making unexpected plans can draw his attention. E.g

I will be visiting my family tomorrow.

Or

I am going to watch movies later.

This tactic reveals an independent lady. Seeing you chase your interest and passion will make him rethink losing you.

18. Refrain from asking him for help

Another brilliant step is to withdraw from his helping grasp. Start refusing his help, even if it’s a small matter. Taking this path reveals your capability and independence. Whenever he offers to help, decline it with a text. E.g

No, thank you. I can handle it myself. 

Or

I will move the couch when I return from work.

Or

I have already applied for a loan to pay the tuition.

This tactic is an eye-opener that shows you’re an independent woman. It also shows you can move on without his assistance. This method is effective in changing how he treats you.


ALSO READ: Happy Birthday Wishes That Will Make Him Smile


19. Start making your own decisions 

Men like being in control, and it makes them wonder when they are not. You can also use the dominant trait by making the decisions before he can. E.g

Hey babe, I made reservations for us tonight. 

Or

You should make dinner tomorrow night.

Or

I’ll be spending more time with my family.

This tactic shows that you take charge of situations and will make him value the time he has with you. It builds confidence, strength, and independence. He’ll appreciate you more and show more respect. 

20. Make new boundaries 

If your relationship is ruining you, it’s time to stop the disrespect. If he is fond of late-night texts, delays responding, or makes shabby plans, setting new boundaries will make your partner recheck his behavior.

You can get your point across without saying a word. E.g

Ignore his mid-night text and see the outcome

Or

Don’t reply to his text.

Or send him a text, like,

I’ve realized I need to put myself first.

This tactic is effective because it’s time to rethink if he ignores you. But if he texts you the next day, it’s acceptable. Many people are afraid of setting new boundaries. The method may be cruel, but it’s effective and creates respect in the relationship. 

21. Stop pampering him

When a man becomes too comfortable, it sometimes brings disrespect. You can tackle this by cutting off the extra goodies you give him. For example, you can stop sending him good night texts or morning texts.

E.g

I need time to focus on myself.

This tactic will make him value how much effort you add to his life. This reply should be an eye-opener for a man who values you. 

22. Refrain from texting for attention

A man likes it when you crave his attention. So, it’s better to pay less attention to him. The less you text for his attention, the more he will want to be with you.

For example, Refrain from texting about what he does or doesn’t do with you.

This tactic will make him fear losing you since you show less interest in him. It also shows that you’re ready to let him go and live your life. The less interest you show, the more he will realize something is missing.

23. Avoid texting to please him.

It becomes a thorn if you try to please your man with every text you send. He can take your effort for granted. But a little withdrawal from the habit will make him think. E.g 

It would help if you didn’t text me those nasty words

Or 

I don’t appreciate many questions 

This tactic will reveal how much he cares about your text. It also prevents him from taking advantage of your emotions. However, you need to prepare for his response without giving yourself away.

24. Your text should show you’re ready to move on

Use your text to show that you can have fun without him. Text him pictures of how you’re doing without him. A woman is supposed to make a man chase her. E.g

Send him a hang-out photo with your friends

Or

Send him a work photo with a male colleague 

This tactic is not about jealousy but showing him there is fun even in his absence. It will increase his appreciation for you. 

25. Lower your text interest

The less you text him, the more he realizes he’s losing you. Text him less about his work, worries, or stories. This notice will make him more attentive to your needs and can make him begin to seek your attention. E.g

Hey babe, how’re you?

Or

Hey babe, I hope you’re fine.

Or

I need space to think about things.

Keeping it simple is the easiest way to make a guy seek your interest. He’ll channel his attention to you and make you feel wanted.

What happens when you do everything you can and your partner remains unchanged?

If your partner remains unfazed and doesn’t change after applying the insights in this article, then you need a different approach. But if he sees his error and changes, that’s great. Remember that too much comfort can make people forget right from wrong. 

However, if you’re talking about it and no changes are forthcoming, it’s time to ask yourself what you want. His lack of change shows how little he cares and respects you.

If the case remains the same, why not leave the relationship and look for a better partner? It’s time to become the center of your world by not seeking attention from anyone. 

Choose to let go or fight for your relationship

If your man exhibits nonchalant and arrogant behaviors and is unwilling to change, it’s time to walk away. However, you must consider whether the break is worth it or if extra work will be better.

If the extra work is worth it, you need to take action that will make your man sit up. Making him realize he’s losing you will make him fight for you. 

Sending him text messages that will make him fear losing you can be the trick to reigniting the flame in your relationship.  

Your partner’s reaction when you send these messages can lift or bring down your spirit. You shouldn’t feel bruised or insecure in a working relationship.

The point is, don’t be stuck in an unsatisfying and unhappy relationship. But if you wish to give him a chance, use our text message tips in this article to reset your relationship.

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